I used to be a New Year’s resolutions type girl, but this past holiday season, I decided on a new approach: do it anyway. Now, if you follow me on social media you know that I’ve been on to something for a while now. #DoItAnyway was a present theme for 2018, so I decided to apply this powerful mantra to all of 2019. I used to make resolutions because that’s the messaging that society puts out-we see lots of advertising for fitness programs and dieting trends, vitamins, financial wellness programs, new wardrobe choices, gym memberships, car sales, even pitches for home decor. Now don’t get me wrong, all that we see is to benefit the consumer, but if you’re like me-nothing seemed to stick. I always found myself right back to old habits-just with a lot of new stuff I didn’t need. So as 2018 was coming to a close, I was intentionally absent from social media. I took the time to really and truly reflect on what it is that I want for my life and here is what I’ve concluded: I have to be a doer. It seems so simple, but when I started to evaluate my habits in relation to my goals, I noticed that delay was often not because of some external circumstance, it was a lack of action on my part. I noticed that I would have moments where I was extremely motivated and I would make a slew of posts about whatever had sparked an interest in me only to make declarations and such that I would ultimately let go stale or that I would fail to make good on. I realized that I was more into setting goals than actually doing the work to achieve them! Gasp! I was addicted to visualizing and scrolling for inspirational content because it subconsciously gave me an excuse and a way to escape from the hard work that comes with achieving goals. I was choosing to pacify my fear over actually doing what it takes to make my dreams a reality. Oh my gosh! To accept that I was cheating myself out of the life I wanted normally would have devastated me, but I’ve made the decision to not dwell on my challenges, but to actually do something about them. So far, 2019 has gotten off to a wonderful start! Here are a few steps that you can take to become a doer this year.
- Cultivate discipline. In Marc and Angel Chernoff’s Getting Back to Happy, they assert, “too often we obsess over a big goal, something we desperately want in our life, but are completely unfocused when it comes to the ritual-the recurring steps-that ultimately makes the goal attainable.” They go on to discuss the direct relation that achievement has with discipline and how discipline is cultivated from daily rituals. The lack of discipline is directly correlated with the stalemate we often experience in our lives. Get you some DISCIPLINE sis! Start with something simple, like making your bed as soon as you get up or washing your coffee cup immediately after finishing, as suggested by Marc and Angel.
- Implement a schedule. March 25, 2019, my blog will be a year old and including this post, I have exactly six articles posted. Six! So, I have implemented a writing schedule. Sundays are currently my best days for productivity, so that’s when I have scheduled myself to write and post. No excuses. I have a goal to grow thecrwnd.blog into a true platform for all things self-love and it’s just not going to get there with six posts.
- Be Accountable. I completed my first speaking engagement of 2019 this past Saturday and I met some incredible people-their feedback about my short talk was all the proof I needed that I am heading in the right direction and because of this-I know the work that I have set out to do is necessary. I can no longer operate the way I did in 2018. I owe it to them and my masterwork to get my shit together. With that, I have enlisted an accountability partner. She is a no-nonsense, do-what-you-said, kick you in the ass-type. She is also a doer and her work speaks for her.
- Create a workable plan. Since I’ve started this whole life-changing journey of self-love, I have been inspired to take myself to higher heights, to change how I define myself and to destroy my own limiting beliefs. I thrive off of small successes, so I have learned to take my big goals and break them down into smaller goals that I can work on and achieve quickly. The momentum gained from these small successes builds my momentum for work towards the bigger ones. My plan includes a timeline and a checkpoint-these serve to keep me on track and to assess my progress.
- Trust yourself. Trust in my ability has been one of the biggest hurdles for me. I either invite a past failure or fear into the present or I over think the future with a hailstorm of what-ifs. In order to stop this cycle, I apply this principle to making decisions: I trust myself to be able to handle it-whether the result is positive or negative-I can handle it.
This year, let’s move past seeing it and get into doing it. We can do this!